


Waterproof

by misbehavingvigilante



Series: Tales Inspired by the Discord [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Chronic Illness, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-11 22:21:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16861270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misbehavingvigilante/pseuds/misbehavingvigilante
Summary: A rattling, wheezing noise reached his ears. Briefly, Tony wondered if a human was drowning again, or at least the more Hollywood adaptation of drowning, as often drowning was more subtle and sinister than dramatic and demanding of attention.





	Waterproof

**Author's Note:**

> Once again I'm posting stony because of the MCU stony server being great for inspo. 
> 
> This is a little less crackish than my last piece and a little longer and if this happens again I should maybe a series for being inspired by the server lol.
> 
> With that said, enjoy and let me know if my tags are lacking!

A rattling, wheezing noise reached his ears. Briefly, Tony wondered if a human was drowning again, or at least the more Hollywood adaptation of drowning, as often drowning was more subtle and sinister than dramatic and demanding of attention.

But then, he reasoned he would have heard the splash, as close to shore as he was, he had to be mindful of every last sound because it could mean drawing attention to himself.

Not that in itself was a bad thing. Tony liked attention, okay? There was nothing wrong with liking attention but humans in general didn’t know about Mers and it was considered a severe social faux pas to go spreading around that knowledge just because you couldn’t resist the allure of shiny things.

Not that Tony hadn’t taken offense to that. He wasn’t a bird after all! He was far above Barton’s level even if that pest could fly. He liked the shore because it meant careless humans sometimes dropped tech into the ocean waters and he could scavenge, not everyone had adapted to waterproof smartphones and even a shorted out phone could useful parts if you were him since phones were the mostly commonly dropped.

Or when he got lucky, sometimes, someone dropped in a waterproof phone and he really got to have a hands on approach to the tech and really test how waterproof, waterproof actually was.

It gave him great theories of how to make new and improved versions when he had this kind of hands on experience.

But back to the point, before he went too off the deep end of another technology tangent with no one possibly around to share in his brilliance. The rattling sound continued, and if anything deepened making a truly worrying sound that even Tony knew humans weren’t supposed to make anything close to that if they were healthy.

He peeked his head above water, searching the waterline for anything amiss if it was indeed human and that he wasn’t getting tricked again by a witch. Natasha was a very frightening woman, and did not hesitate to put him in his place if he even so much as thought about crossing a line.

She reminded him of Pepper like that, and unsurprisingly enough those two got on swimmingly.

Heh, Tony couldn’t help his laughter. Small bubbles floating to the surface as further evidence of his amusement in what was probably a very ill placed timing for someone else. But he just couldn’t ignore the low hanging fruit when it was so tempting, now could he?

Tony finally spotted movement on a nearby pier some small distance again given he could swim quickly and quietly if he wanted to but that was really a waste if people could miss his signature red and gold fins. And the rest of his scales littering his body marking his otherworldly quite plainly.

Or just as a really devoted cosplayer or a professional mermaid since they were a thing in this modern world now.

Tony had several conversations with drunk and stoned humans before making no effort to hide himself because he could just explain his presence away like that or by just claiming to be a figment of their imagination.

He got asked about mermaid magic often, and naturally he responded with a Spongebob reference to do his due part in this world.

Again, getting distracted. Tony swam silently underneath the ocean enough that he wouldn’t quite be seen by any wandering eyes because really if there was a crisis, then he didn’t need to be around and get blamed for drowning some poor fool.

He had never attempted to drown a human before at least. Another creature like him? Well…

Tony slid underneath the pier when he reached it, coming around the opposite side of the huddled over figure on the pier that was wheezing like there was something wrong with him. Or at least it looked like him given that broad build, but you couldn’t always assume these things either.

Hadn’t that kind of cough be eradicated through the use of vaccines?

Or it could be asthma. Tony blinked, remembering eyeing something not quite shiny but out of the ordinary enough he could tell it had belonged to a human before it had been dropped to its watery grave.

Tony swam down and thumbed at the material, careful of his claws not to pierce the pouch again and recalling this particular blend of material tended to ward out water relatively well so long as it wasn’t punctured. Despite all the technical progress humans had made thus far, inhalers retain a similar shape and ultimately were rather unfashionable choosing a streamlined design that didn’t have to sacrifice itself for aesthetics but did anyways.

Regardless of visibility, Tony broke the surface and gently placed the packet on the docket.

There seemed to be a stunned moment of awe when blue eyes met his dark ones but it was ruined by even deeper, more desperate sound than before. The man ripped open the packet by himself, sending a few knickknacks flying here and there and it was probably the wrong time to continue to admire his physique but damn.

He might not actually be human if he looked like that, or at least not fully.

Tony heard a soft splash of something entering the water and with the huffing sound that told him the inhaler was working, he swam down to retrieve whatever the mystery item was. It appeared to be keys, which would be definitely missed and only add to what seemed a rather miserable day if Tony left them where they were.

He returned, rotating the keyring on one finger and making a nice chiming noise as the blond’s breathing seemed to be evening out and returning to normal.

Which was good, Tony wouldn’t exactly know how to do respond if the situation hadn’t resolved itself like that. Maybe he did need to pick up cpr classes after all. Mer gifts were only good underwater and unless he had physically dragged this fine specimen into the depths, and kissed him essentially but in actuality breathe in his ability to breathe underwater as a temporary boon. The thing was most humans understandably though they were being drowned, and it wasn’t as if that wasn’t the case sometimes and given the already lack of breathing, it probably would have just made things worse.

Eyes returned to him once again, fixated but wary, to the point Tony almost felt like posing but that might give the impression he was mocking the human. Which again probably wasn’t the most appropriate activity right now given the near death experience.

If Tony hadn’t been around… it was possible, and the thought had probably crossed the blond’s mind already or it would soon enough.

“Thank you.”

Tony blinked. Wondering if he had heard that right and with his free hand went to shake the waters out of his curved ears, not that it really had an effect anyways, but he felt better for trying. He flattened the keys against his palm and placed it on the dock too.

“Thank you? Aren’t you supposed to ask if I’m real or not? Or if you’re dreaming?”

“You saved me.”

Tony blinked again at the earnest tone, and it really was too much. Who could sound that earnest and not look like they were the picture of deception trying to goat you into something you’d regret.

“Hey, uh, are you sure you’re human?”

“As far as I know.”

“Right, well, what’s your name? You do have a name I’m guessing?”

“That’s rude.” There was a scrunched up look on his face that Tony only found adorable instead of the irritation that was probably intended. “I’ll tell you mine, if you tell me yours.”

“I saved your life.” Tony huffed, offended.

“Yeah, but you were rude about it.”

Tony rolled his eyes, wondering where this Dorito of almost unbelievable, almost unfathomable proportions got the nerve to suggest he was rude, but he bit his snark replied comment back because damn it, he was curious! “It’s Tony.”

“Steve. I hate to seem rude but I should really get back home and rest.”

Tony watched Steve gather his things still spread across the dock, and grimaced loudly when he came across a blocky, and outdated device. “What is that?” Tony couldn’t sound anymore disgusted if he tried.

“A phone?” Steve sounded confused. “Do you not know what it is?”

“I know more about tech than you!” Tony hissed, over dramatically but still he never liked the fact that it was such a human ideal to assume they had no grasp of technology whatsoever when confronted with a bonafida supernatural creature. “Why do you have something outdated? Don’t you have a better phone? They didn’t even make waterproof phones back then.”

“It still works.”

“Oh my god. You’re killing me. Please go back home and rest, I need to reacquaint myself with more civilized people that don’t hold onto such fossils!”

 

~

 

Steve hadn’t expected much returning to the pier near his house. It was probably a bad idea to return given that meeting hadn’t ended all that well, he could still be grateful to the Merman that saved him even if he had been rude. He had never expected him to have such strong opinions on tech though.

Maybe that had been a mistake on his end? This was his first time meeting another creature, or again, that he knew of, wasn’t it after all possible he knew of someone already that wasn’t quite human?

Surely they couldn’t just stay in the water like Tony.

That would be an awfully shallow supernatural world.

Steve shook his head that was just a terrible if well suited pun before something glittering in the sunlight caught his eye at the end of the pier. He walked forward though, he already had an idea of what it was and that theory was confirmed when he crouched down and looked at a phone.

A phone that had been precariously left there right on the edge and still had some water droplets resting on it.

It chimed in a similar tone that Bucky’s phone rang when he received a message, and the vibration that accompanied it nearly sent him over the edge in Steve’s haste to grab it before it hit the waters edge.

It was only after he thought about it for a moment that he realized two things. One the phone was waterproof thus would survive being submerged unlike his previously phone and two if he was texted just at the very moment he went to approach in then that must have meet Tony was nearby and watching him flounder.

He really needed to stop with the puns.

Steve clicked through the screen, surprised when no lock screen greeted him and easily found his ways to messages.

“If you have to rely on a creature of the depth to get a new phone, then buddy, you have a real problem!”

An additional message was sent after.

“Holy Shit! You just almost went over the edge. LOL.”

Again, Steve wasn’t wrong about Tony being rude, but maybe he just had an abrasive personality in general? Bucky could take some time to warm up to given he could be curt and distant, perhaps Mer society had different values on what constituted as rude and not.

The phone chimed again, but this time instead of a text message, it was a selfie of Tony making the peace sign with his fingers and generally looking like he had just been laughing moments before given the bright look in his eyes, and brimming smile.

Tony did look pretty happy though, and that wasn’t entirely an unattractive look on him, it’s just his personality that was unattractive.

Maybe, it was something that would get better since Tony went to the trouble of giving him a phone, it obviously meant he wanted to communicate with him and Steve wasn’t as a whole disinterested in the idea.

 

~

 

“You got a new phone?” Bucky sounded and looked skeptical, not that Steve could plan him considering Bucky had been trying and failing to get him a new one for quite some time now insisting that he needed to get with the time and smart phones weren’t as breakable as he thought they were if he just used a case.

Steve didn’t even begin to know how to explain how he had in fact come to be in possession off a new phone. “Uh, yeah.”

“How did you get a new phone?”

“You don’t have to act the sky is falling because I happened to get a new phone without you.”

Bucky narrowed his eyes, continuing to feel suspicious about the new phone when he in fact knew damn well how coveted Steve treated the thing. “I shot your old phone and you still didn’t get rid of it.”

“It still worked.” Steve reasoned. “You didn’t have to do something so dramatic.”

“So then why did you switch phones?”

“It broke.”

“Really? It broke, after everything I put that damn phone through, you would swear it was magically enhanced by how it didn’t die.”

Steve raised an eyebrow at how Bucky got quiet all of the sudden thereafter.

“Bucky?”

“Oh, it’s nothing, it’s just apparently I have to go see a mutual friends of ours about something.” Bucky rose from the table they had been chatting and walked towards the front door, stopping only to look back at him for a moment. “Enjoy your new phone, I’ll be back later to grill you on more.”

“I’ll be sure I’m not here.”  Steve waved back.

He waited a few minutes before he started texting Tony as it had turned out the Mer was particularly impatient by him being a normal person and not on call to respond to his text by the minute.


End file.
